good things take time, they said

From waiting on the cookies to come out of my easy-bake oven all the way to waiting on a promotion at my job — I have always heard someone say good things take time. I never doubted this, but I don’t think I ever took those words to heart in my younger years, maybe because my immediate response was “well, how long?” and since no one could give me the answer I wanted, I just carried on in my impatient ways. As I’ve grown older I’ve begun to understand that people didn’t have my answer simply because no one but God has that answer. Up to this point in my life I rarely considered what that phrase might look like or feel like for the relationships in my life. And as I tend to learn things the hard way, I am truly grateful for grace and grateful I don’t have to learn everything in the hardest way.

I’m realizing how often I experience a good thing and then run with the idea of what I want it to be. Only later do I come to the decision to mindfully slow up. I’ve realized “slowing up” is easier said than done as it’s going to be an everyday decision regarding the things I care most about. Everything really is better out of my hands and things only get harder when I try to take control. No need for unnecessary tension, for forced circumstances, for rushed growth when you leave it in God’s hands.

My nature is to move quickly and sometimes too fast for my own good. My parents would attest to this as I’m sure they vividly remember how quickly I wanted those training wheels off my bike as young and hopeful kindergartener. Little did I know that would be my first lesson of if you leave me in complete control, I miiight just crash. Not everyone’s nature is like that, some move slower, maybe even too slow. Now, I do not believe this nature of mine is stemmed in carelessness but rather the opposite. Often, the driving force for my rushed sense of doing is the care — it’s love and it’s affection and it’s excitement and it is wrapped in eagerness — however, if I’m not correctly stewarding my passions, my care, my dreams and desires then I’m on course to ruin a good thing. Although my intentions may be loving and pure and honest it means nothing if it is forced. That’s because patience matters most when you’re trying to grow something. Nowadays I’m more aware that I shouldn’t let time dictate how or when I express my feelings, but I also remember that time does indeed matter (most) when I’m in the midst of growth. In both scenarios, we ought to let time serve us instead of falling into the pressure of us serving time.

Nothing has taught me patience like choosing to love a person that hasn’t experienced a love like the one I’m able to give. This choice aids my growth because I’m steadily adjusting to the fact that I don’t own another being and reconstructing my thoughts and feelings about things not going “as expected.” Daily I am introduced to a self-awareness that requires work and worth. For it all, I’ll choose patience.

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